{"id":7757,"date":"2017-02-13T16:17:43","date_gmt":"2017-02-13T13:17:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/3alamaltanmya.com\/?p=7757"},"modified":"2017-02-13T16:17:43","modified_gmt":"2017-02-13T13:17:43","slug":"keeping-spark-alive","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/3alamaltanmya.com\/?p=7757","title":{"rendered":"KEEPING THE SPARK ALIVE"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Long distance never works.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThe seven year itch is real.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cChildren always kill romance.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou can\u2019t have love and a successful career. You have to choose.\u201d<\/p>\n

Chances are you\u2019ve heard at least one of these statements, or a variation on the theme. One of the most common myths about long-term relationships is that passion is only for the beginning of a relationship. It\u2019s the \u201czsa zsa zsu\u201d that we talk about, the butterflies, the excitement, the spark. But that spark will inevitably dim down and simmer, and perhaps even sizzle out altogether and disappear.<\/p>\n

Sound familiar?<\/p>\n

WHY SPARKS STOP FLYING<\/h3>\n

Couples will cite countless reasons for their fire dying. Usually these reasons cluster around not having enough time to spend together. That might be because of long distance, seemingly incompatible work schedules or simply children and their needs. What might have been a temporary state unconsciously becomes habit. The excuse becomes \u201ctomorrow,\u201d or \u201cnext week,\u201d or \u201cwhen things are settled.\u201d<\/p>\n

Less time together leads to a loss of intimacy, which manifests as a loss of attraction. The loss of attraction leads to decreased communication between partners, starting off a cycle of negativity that becomes one of frustration and further distance.<\/p>\n

Yet keeping the spark alive is possible. But it takes more than just scheduling a date or two to make real, lasting change in a relationship.<\/p>\n

6 WAYS TO KEEP THE FIRE ALIVE<\/h3>\n

1. CREATE<\/strong><\/h4>\n

You have to create what you want, not just go hunting for it. To be a good partner you need to be emotionally fit and shift from wanting something to doing something. Think back to the start of your relationship: you were willing to do whatever it takes to make that person happy. What are you willing to do now?<\/p>\n

2. TALK WITH YOUR PARTNER<\/strong><\/h4>\n

You need to have five times as many positive communications as negative ones to have a good relationship, particularly if you want an intimate one. It\u2019s easy to see the negative impact of people feeling shut down and shut out of their intimate partner\u2019s sphere. Talking doesn\u2019t just mean chatting for a few minutes before falling asleep. It means making plans about your future, understanding your partner\u2019s love language and finding out what\u2019s on the other\u2019s mind.<\/p>\n

3. GROW<\/strong><\/h4>\n

What we\u2019re attracted to in others is another part of ourselves that we\u2019re not activating. Then we get resentful because those qualities are being shut down and stifled in the other person, which comes through as frustration with the relationship. Growth happens when we step out of our comfort zone, so go do something new together. \u201cPeople often say, We\u2019ll laugh about this someday,\u201d Tony observes. \u201cI say, why wait?\u201d<\/p>\n

4. PLAN SURPRISES<\/strong><\/h4>\n

It sounds counterintuitive, but planning for spontaneity can make a huge difference for partners. One of our favorites is to plan a surprise date: block off time on your partner\u2019s calendar but don\u2019t say what you\u2019ll be doing. Then spend quality time doing something you both enjoy, whether that\u2019s going for a beverage or dinner, seeing a show, taking a walk, going on a weekend getaway\u2026 Your partner will see that you care enough to make time for them and you\u2019ll remember reasons that you got into this relationship in the first place.<\/p>\n

5. STOP LIVING OLD STORIES<\/strong><\/h4>\n

This moment is the only thing that\u2019s real. So don\u2019t filter your partner through a past story. That\u2019s old news and it\u2019s over. Instead, think about what will make that person feel loved and seen. Then do those things. Don\u2019t know? Ask.<\/p>\n

6. GIVE<\/strong><\/h4>\n

Giving shows that you\u2019re making your partner a priority. Remember, if you contribute nothing, you get nothing. If you get nothing, it\u2019s likely that you feel insignificant and unloved. Instead, think about what you can give to your partner to make them feel filled, seen, and understand that they are your top priority. Go farther than your partner expects and you\u2019ll be each other\u2019s own #1 fan<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Create surprises, not roadblocks. An even easier way to keep your spark? Do what you did at the beginning of your relationship and there won\u2019t be an end.<\/p>\n

\u00a0by :- Team Tony<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

This article was published in 3alamaltanmya<\/a><\/p>\n

sponsored by Future Builders International Academy<\/a><\/p>\n

Led by Dr.Maha Fouad<\/a><\/p>\n

\"e5f2ef68-75e1-4678-9ffc-3479da505483\"<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/section>\n

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Long distance never works.\u201d \u201cThe seven year itch is real.\u201d \u201cChildren always kill romance.\u201d \u201cYou can\u2019t have love and a successful career. You have to choose.\u201d Chances are you\u2019ve heard at least one of these statements, or a variation on the theme. One of the most common myths about long-term relationships is that passion is …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":7761,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11956],"tags":[12330,15303,14795,15304,15305,15306],"class_list":["post-7757","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-english-articles","tag-children","tag-distance","tag-habit","tag-negativity","tag-relationship","tag-week"],"yoast_head":"\nKEEPING THE SPARK ALIVE - \u062c\u0631\u064a\u062f\u0629 \u0639\u0627\u0644\u0645 \u0627\u0644\u062a\u0646\u0645\u064a\u0629<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/3alamaltanmya.com\/?p=7757\" class=\"yoast-seo-meta-tag\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"ar_AR\" class=\"yoast-seo-meta-tag\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" class=\"yoast-seo-meta-tag\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"KEEPING THE SPARK ALIVE - \u062c\u0631\u064a\u062f\u0629 \u0639\u0627\u0644\u0645 \u0627\u0644\u062a\u0646\u0645\u064a\u0629\" class=\"yoast-seo-meta-tag\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Long distance never works.\u201d \u201cThe seven year itch is real.\u201d \u201cChildren always kill romance.\u201d \u201cYou can\u2019t have love and a successful career. 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